Choices and Motivations

The last few days have been full of many lessons for me. And they all seem to go back to one theme. I think, perhaps, God is trying to teach me something. It all started, or at least came to a culmination when I read this section of the Bible the other day.

"Besides this you know the time, that the hour has come for you to wake from sleep. For salvation is nearer to us now than when we first believed. The night is far gone; the day is at hand. So then let us cast off the works of darkness and put on the armor of light. Let us walk properly as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and sensuality, not in quarreling and jealousy. But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to gratify its desires" Romans 13:11-14

The main thing I've been learning from all this is that my life and ministry are not about me. By a series of circumstances, whether by something I observe in someone else's life or seeing the attitudes of my own heart, I've realized how easy it can be to forget the eternal nature of every day and every decision I make. If taken to an extreme, it is a sobering reality that one wrong decision can have the potential to move me down a path of walking away from Christ's best for my life and ministry. It seems harsh, but it's true simply because of the ripple effect. Often one wrong decision can lead to another, which in turn leads to a calloused heart. These wrong decisions seem to begin in one thought; that somehow I deserve certain things and am entitled to certain rights to pursue the things my flesh desires. But I've realized lately how wrong of an assumption that is and how weak a lifestyle to walk in. If I pursue only those things that fulfill the purpose of gratifying the flesh, it will be impossible for me to live a life that first pleases God, second praises God and third acts as a guiding light to lead others to God.
There are choices to make in everyday life. In my life, it can be anything from simple choices, to interacting with youth I minister to, to how I respond to someone in need. Do I get uptight about an added responsibility simply because it is an inconvenience to my schedule? Do I make a decision to value something on the basis of it feeling good? Do I choose to watch tv instead of spending time with God simply because the day has been long and I "deserve" mindless time to defrag?
The list of acts in this section of Scripture are all based in a selfish motivation...yes some of them are "worse" than others (by human standards). "Orgies, drunkenness, sexual immorality, sensuality, quarreling and jealousy." But all of these acts come from a heart that is focused on self, and in particular, on fulfilling what the flesh desires. I believe that today more than ever, because "salvation is nearer now than when we first believed," it is crucial for me to live according to these lessons I have been learning lately, and to encourage others to do the same. Instead of gratifying the desires of the flesh, I should "live worthy of Christ because this life is not about you."